LUCKY PETITE

Read a book, and I think I found the answer to my question in my head. Definitely need to share this.

"...feeling like I'm marching to a different drummer than most of the world. I couldn't understand why many of my schoolmates and co-workers enjoyed talking with lots of people and spending large amounts of time visiting when I preferred just one or two close friends, more intimate settings, and deeper conversation. I coudn't figure out why I would rather remain in the background and think about a topic before speaking, while others would vocalize their thoughts without restraint. I couldn't fathom how people who became my closest and dearest friend later would tell me that they thought I was 'cold' or 'aloof' upon first impression but realized I was 'anything but' after they got to know me.I was very intelligent, always an honours student and later and excellent business person, and truly liked people. But I couldn't seem to get the hang of the whole socializing bit. I wondered if something was 'wrong' with me. I began the process of self-discovery and research years ago, and I'm convinced more than ever that shyness is a symptom and introversion is the source. Introversion is not a disease, quite the contrary, but it can be certainly viewed as a handicap in an extroverted world. In order to be effective in my job (I'm in a very extroverted job that involves talking to people most of the day) I've learned a number of things that have helped me to accept and 'manage' my introversion.

1. Nothing is wrong with me. I have lots to offer to others because I'm an introvert, cannot, and should not, change who I am. But I can become more effective in my interaction with others.
2. I have learned to be extrovert if needed. If I anticipate a period of extroversion that involves a difficult discussion or confrontation, I will often rehearse it mentally or in writing. However, I must schedule counter balance (quiet and solace) following times of extroversion in order to recharge my batteries.
3. I must assess the 'audience' with which I am interacting and adapt my behaviour accordingly when dealing with an extrovert. I should not expect the extrovert to adapt with me. I adapt to them to communicate better.
4. I will place myself in situations that require me to strengthen my weak extroversion 'muscle'. For example, I volunteer for leadership positions for which I am uncomfortable in order to develop more expertise in dealing with others. I force myself to speak up in meetings rather than sitting by passively.
5. I look for tips and techniques to help me feel at ease making the small talk that extroverts enjoy. When the necessity arises, I can become the 'pseudoextrovert'. Much to my pleasure, once I get the conversation started, the extrovert will typically do the majority of the talking. Because I genuinely like people, I listen and appreciate that I've got to know someone better or made a new friend. I would have missed out on that opportunity if I did not make the first approach. 
6. I encourage my children's extroversion even though it is uncomfortable at times. However, I also try to teach them to be sensitive to introverts in their lives, like their mother, and to recognize that a person's need for times of solitude is just another way of approaching life.  ..." 

She is definitely at different level. She owned her own crown already.  But, You (if you too, one of a kind) and I, learn from her! Just, begin!

this video,

https://youtu.be/_CAMx7nkP8o

made me cry a river this Raya first..

over everything and anything, I don't want anything bad happen to me (pray to God) because I don't want to burden anyone anymore..more than others, I know I burdened them (my family members) even if they denied that everytime I mentioned it (which was sooo kind of them)..

because I am abah's hope, family's hope for a reason or two..

May God Al-Mighty protect me, and you guys too my reader.

xoxo.love.

mum..

I miss you..

I really do..

T.T

so now it is 10pm gmt+2..

I was in the kitchen earlier cooking something to satisfy my hunger and this sudden thought came across my mind..

"MAN..

I think I am totally frustrated with them..I am afraid being with them..they provide me no safe..I still don't feel protected whilst I am with them, MAN. So how, how? Of course, our prophet (pbuh) is always the guide to the best of the best..he is always the best example if I really need someone as examplary..but then..he is he..man nowdays? Is there's still someone as good as what I dreamt of?"

I dont know anymore..my heart hardened I think..maybe it just broke with those frustrations in the past..

well, maybe this is the best path and phase that has been fated for me..

I believe, if there's something good for me later on, things will change in split second..as it supposed..

and, as for now, focus for what actually matters . triple hearts.  Trust yourself more, for that will bring the confidence into you, nadia xoxo

alhamdulillah, thank God for everything..
I can't not be grateful for what He gave me..alhamdulillah alhamdulillah..

after 5 years of 'tak kedepan'..

and there you go..1st Scientific Conference of 5th Undergraduate Students..presented the case for my group presentation..may this be the beginning to  many more successes in the future.. 

thanks mates!

Let’s take the example of Sayyidatina Maryam (‘alayhissalam), also known as Mary. Before Sayyidatina Maryam was even born, her purpose had been set. Her ageing mother had vowed that if her prayer to have a child was accepted, she would ensure that her child would be dedicated to serving Allah. Fulfil her promise, she did. Sayyidatina Maryam wasn’t left to grow up on her own; she was placed under the care of Prophet Zakariya (‘alayhissalam), also known as Zechariah. She was raised in a room in a mosque. She was religious, chaste and modest. She did not mix freely with the opposite sex and confined herself within her prayer chamber. Whenever Prophet Zakariya entered Sayyidatina Maryam’s room to check if she was alright, he would be surprised to find that food had already been served. During winter, there were summer fruits. During summer, he saw winter fruits.

“Where is the food from, Maryam?”

“Allah provides to whom He wills.”

Sayyidatina Maryam was so pure that she was picked to bear Prophet Isa (‘alayhissalaam), also known as Jesus, without being touched by any men. The angels reassured her that Allah had chosen her and purified her and selected her above the women of the worlds. Fearing the reaction of people around her, she fleed to deliver on her own in the middle of a scorching hot desert. Throughout her whole ordeal, she relied on no one other than Allah. She didn’t need anyone, not a husband or even her guardian, to be around.

Imagine how the people around you would react if you suddenly turned up with a newborn, without being married? Sayyidatina Maryam was given the difficult task of keeping quiet when she returned to her village. Naturally, everyone started criticising and cursing her. If you were in her position, would have remained speechless through the injustice that was being done?

Sayyidatina Maryam endured patiently and pointed to her baby. Then, Baby Isa stood up for his mother and informed the crowd that he was a Prophet. Subhanallah!

Without getting married, Sayyidatina Maryam was able to reach the pinnacle of piety. Her status was so high that she has a chapter in the Quran named after her. She showed us that she did not need a man; Allah Himself could defend her honour through His miracle.

How about me?

The purpose of my existence is to know, love and worship Allah. Every action, every step, every thought needs to be focused on Allah. To solve my problem, I had to go to the very root of it – my ever-widening distance from Allah. Am I looking for lovebecause I am ready or because I am lonely?  Am I praying on time? Am I conscious of Allah in everything that I do? Am I reading the Quran consistently? Do I perform taubah and istighfar constantly? What have I been doing to strengthen my relationship with Him? With each answer, it became more and more obvious that my Imaan was on the decline.

Through the awful scrapes and burns and agonizing heartbreaks, I was moved to comprehend that, like Sayyidatina Maryam,  I had to turn to none except Allah. I came to realise that my relationship with Him is the most important relationship of all. Only Allah can grant me strength, courage, love, guidance, protection and patience. Only Allah is capable of making me whole. When I feel whole, I won’t rush to find a partner to complete me. When I feel whole, with Allah by my side, I would be able to bravely walk away from those who try to pry me away from Him. When I am whole, I would be better able to choose someone to share my completeness with and whom can accompany me on my path to Allah.

I’m not saying that I am perfect and that my level of Imaan is anywhere near Sayyidatina Maryam’s. However, things have picked up for me, alhamdulillah. This year, I got married to a man, whom I trust, is able to guide me to be a better Muslim. A man who was brave enough to walk up to my parents and ask for my hand in marriage. A man who made me realize why it never worked out with anyone else. Only when I was brave enough to let go and be the best version of me did Allah grant me someone so gentlemanly that part of me still can’t believe that he exists.

So don’t you worry, my fellow seeker. Allah knows when you’re hurt. Allah knows when you are bereaved. Allah knows when you struggle to get up because all you want to do is curl up in bed and hide from the world. Be sure, that when Allah takes away something from you, He’s only making space for something better. We just have to keep striving…

hi..

so I just finished watching this video by malaysia airlines..

https://youtu.be/MOrZ-2N0yI8

what a lovely relationship they have..I like the story..
and for some reason that I don't even know, I'd always find anything related to aviation (airlines, airport, pilot and even flight attendant) is comforting..I feel relax..like I mentioned before flight time has always been mind relaxing one for me **though practically physically tired on a long haul one**
they just have something for me to look forward to..everytime..
and yeah, I hope my next journey will be a meaningful one, yet again..perhaps, accompanied by someone who would love to start a lively conversation beside..

yeah, dream on nadia, dream on..haha

alright, till next time, have a good week ahead!

stress at it's peak..

I need a small getaway..need it badly :(

okay first start with the last 2 months event.

our second batch senior's convocation ceremony

"ZAGAZIG UNIVERSITY MALAYSIAN MEDICAL STUDENTS CONVOCATION CEREMONY"

so here is the cheerful morning we started our day with;

and the pictures;

every picture hold it's own story..

the peak moments of that day was when I accidentally met teacher Zaiton and the moment I got a picture taken with that one handsome senior..yeah was a bit crazy back then i think..haha

just for fun, seriously, just for fun that post on fb..just to make my life here in Zagazig a little bit colorful, yeah before going back for good..haha since my previous years, they were so dull you know..and yeah I made it..

anyway, I hope that brother and his fiance did not take that seriously.. I have no such hard feeling for him kot..that was just for fun, yes merely for fun..nothing more.

alright isyak..next time inshaAllah for the next entry..when I have free time of course! :D

but one sure thing, not tomorrow xD

till then, God bless!

today was totally suck..

no I didn't start my day with bad mood though..

but heol clinical session today really put me down..

the patient was terrible..yes I know it was my bad at some part for coming unprepared to class! but still, why did she need to point her fingers to me saying I am small , incompetent and annoyed with me?

whatttt whattttt whatttttt
whyyyyyyyy theres still such descrimination
not fair..totally not fair!

whatever it was nadia, sabar..sabar..sabar

God, pls..grant me goodness :'((

edit:

so today I reread some of my blog posts and came across this one. Well, that's how life is kan? Going through this life, we won't/can't possibly have all ups, there must be some downs too. And yes guys, when you feel down, when someone dissed you, make you feel low and terrible, just put your right hand on your left chest, and say "it's okay, it's fine..I'll better anyway" and if that does not work too, then go check out this video > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFg62bogHz0 Happy watching!

so today I was sooooo lazy to cook anything
so I just ate the ready made kinda food..like bread ? haha

plus drinking coke, nescafe surely worsen the condition for someone with GERD

yeah kind of doing all sort of things my body cannot handle :(

so you reap what you sow la kan..acute attack of sakit perut beb..

so while go to and fro the bathroom, told ain my stomach is not doing well because I have not eat, malas nak masak.

and ain being sooooo sweet today, nak tolong masakkan nasi goreng..I am sooo touched..blessed I am..thank God

thank you ain.. I appreciate your kindness..seriously :* :* :* love you buddy!

xoxo : next post should be convo, fb, conference

losing focus isn't good
.
and I keep losing that precious 'focus'
.
how? how i'm gonna be like before? back to my focus self
.
I seriously need that 'focus'
.
been searching for it for years
.
so where are you dear 'focus'?
.
I really need you
.
come back to me will you?
.
pleaseeeee
.
I beg you
.
just
.
please
.
.
.

I wasn't there though -,-''

happy for them anyway :))

may all the plan go smoothly..
God bless you ayie and tasha! :))