weirdo or not?

7:46 PM


Read a book, and I think I found the answer to my question in my head. Definitely need to share this.

"...feeling like I'm marching to a different drummer than most of the world. I couldn't understand why many of my schoolmates and co-workers enjoyed talking with lots of people and spending large amounts of time visiting when I preferred just one or two close friends, more intimate settings, and deeper conversation. I coudn't figure out why I would rather remain in the background and think about a topic before speaking, while others would vocalize their thoughts without restraint. I couldn't fathom how people who became my closest and dearest friend later would tell me that they thought I was 'cold' or 'aloof' upon first impression but realized I was 'anything but' after they got to know me.I was very intelligent, always an honours student and later and excellent business person, and truly liked people. But I couldn't seem to get the hang of the whole socializing bit. I wondered if something was 'wrong' with me. I began the process of self-discovery and research years ago, and I'm convinced more than ever that shyness is a symptom and introversion is the source. Introversion is not a disease, quite the contrary, but it can be certainly viewed as a handicap in an extroverted world. In order to be effective in my job (I'm in a very extroverted job that involves talking to people most of the day) I've learned a number of things that have helped me to accept and 'manage' my introversion.

  1. Nothing is wrong with me. I have lots to offer to others because I'm an introvert, cannot, and should not, change who I am. But I can become more effective in my interaction with others.
  2. I have learned to be extrovert if needed. If I anticipate a period of extroversion that involves a difficult discussion or confrontation, I will often rehearse it mentally or in writing. However, I must schedule counter balance (quiet and solace) following times of extroversion in order to recharge my batteries.
  3. I must assess the 'audience' with which I am interacting and adapt my behaviour accordingly when dealing with an extrovert. I should not expect the extrovert to adapt with me. I adapt to them to communicate better.
  4. I will place myself in situations that require me to strengthen my weak extroversion 'muscle'. For example, I volunteer for leadership positions for which I am uncomfortable in order to develop more expertise in dealing with others. I force myself to speak up in meetings rather than sitting by passively.
  5. I look for tips and techniques to help me feel at ease making the small talk that extroverts enjoy. When the necessity arises, I can become the 'pseudoextrovert'. Much to my pleasure, once I get the conversation started, the extrovert will typically do the majority of the talking. Because I genuinely like people, I listen and appreciate that I've got to know someone better or made a new friend. I would have missed out on that opportunity if I did not make the first approach. 
  6. I encourage my children's extroversion even though it is uncomfortable at times. However, I also try to teach them to be sensitive to introverts in their lives, like their mother, and to recognize that a person's need for times of solitude is just another way of approaching life.  ..." 




She is definitely at different level. She owned her own crown already.  But, You (if you too, one of a kind) and I, learn from her! Just, begin!

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